you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize