Sry I called you an 8
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
