I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
