And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
