we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
