If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
