I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
