Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize