I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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