i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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