So drunk, too bad you don't want this
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
