he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
