Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
