Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
