I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
