I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
