we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Randomize
