I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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