I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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