Just cropdusted the office
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
