fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
