I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Randomize
