now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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