New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Randomize
