I'm drive I can fine osifer
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
