I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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