She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
