I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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