He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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