Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Randomize
