I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
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