I swear she didn't look like that last week.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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