i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
