Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
