Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
