Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
