Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
