I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
