Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
