just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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