remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
