I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
