Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
