There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
