If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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