Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
The police scanner is talking about you again....
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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