idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize