I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Randomize
