i would punch a child for taco bell
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize