You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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