you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize