wat bout pragnant strippers??
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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