I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
